We pulled off the old sheets and pulled the new onto that top bunk, he and I. He spread the comforter over the top. Then he picked up that blankie, the one worn and graying with the not-so-soft-anymore fuzz and we smiled at each other, each immediately picturing her desperate attempts to make herself small enough to still fit under this beloved square of fabric, and the tears began to course down my cheeks. He looked at me, perplexed yet already knowing what his crazy little wife was thinking, and I choked out, "She's getting big too fast," but not before he had wrapped his arms around me in a hug.
Then we glanced up at the top bunk where our littlest had clambered up the ladder and sat grinning wild at eye-level with me. We burst into laughter and then more tears trickled down as I realized that this one is growing too fast too, but we both laughed at my tears too and then he reached through to tickle that little Squirmy Bug, as her sister so tenderly calls her. And my life is over for awhile now, as I find ways to keep her from climbing the five foot ladder and getting stuck up on top.
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I worked double hard yesterday in order to observe Sabbath today and I was able to keep going because I kept picturing "just sitting" for an hour while the girls all rested. Of course, there was still the flurry of work to get out the door this morning that is unavoidable, but because I had pushed harder last night to make breakfast ahead and start tonight's dinner prep and do extra laundry, I knew I would feel more freedom to sit and knit or read awhile this afternoon. That has been a good thing and something I haven't done often enough lately. I am so glad I did. By the way, this Thai Crunch Salad is what's for dinner and I have no doubt it will be delicious, since all of Mel's recipes are. In related news, I made her Curried Cauliflower "Popcorn" last night and when Jesse tasted it, surprised that he liked it (since neither of us like cauliflower), I looked at his questioning eyes and said "Yep, Mel's" recipe, so of course it was good. I'll be buying cauliflower again and making it again soon.
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One of my favorite memories from the past month is of Lyddie and her friend Harmony at church playing on the new seesaw. I haven't had a camera at hand to catch the moment, but I'm not sure it would capture the unabashed joy both little girls show when the look across and see the other's big smile and they kick one another back up to the sky. "Ouch!" they each say in turn as they bump their little bottoms up and down on the hard seat below and then peals of laughter pour out and fill the playground with the sounds that should be heard at a playground. All the adults pause and look to see the source of this happiness, and their happiness causes more happiness all around. Just as it should be. "Let the little ones come to me."
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I somehow stumbled back across this old blog post from three years ago. Sleeping babies are so lovely, aren't they? Millie is almost exactly Rosie's current age in those photos and I continue my wondering where the time flown to. She still sleeps like that often, on her tummy with her arms all sprawled out and her fingers entwined in the satin ribbon on that same baby doll named Susie.
Just precious, Sarah. :) I know those tears well...with my babies going on 16 & 14 later this summer and early fall. Sigh. Embrace. every. moment!
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